…but it sure did bother a bunch of people in CLT this morning.
I don’t fly out first thing on Monday morning too often, but this morning was definitely an unusual site. There were cots everywhere and people were in a line that looked about 2 hours long for rebooking assistance. I, on the other hand, was heading down to Florida which was actually safe from this hurricane. Funny how fate works out.

I lucked out and the client I was supposed to fly to on Monday wasn’t going to be ready for training.  This meant I didn’t have to worry about canceled flights and I figured by Wednesday when I need to fly to my other client everything would be melted because that’s pretty much how it works.  According to the Charlotte Observer US Airways is still canceling flights through Charlotte and the deicers are out of deicing fluid.

Great…We’ll see if I can make it up to Canada.  Regardless of all that I’d much rather live in Charlotte where those issues do happen, but are few and far between.  Wish me luck getting to my destination.

http://www.wsoctv.com/news/25855378/detail.html

Charlotte Douglas International Airport Director Jerry Orr said he’s wanted a private firm to do security screenings since 2001, when the TSA was created. He named a couple of reasons for that: First, a private firm would be more economical.

Yes it would be more economical, but the problem is they are still required to follow the same rules as TSA as far as identification and such.  Kansas City International (MCI) has a private screening company, but they are just as bad.  Pay is typically lower and since they aren’t federal employees they don’t have the attractive benefits TSA agents do.  People often insult the intelligence of TSOs, but FirstLine employees are often much sloppier looking.  MCI is still so fixated on liquids that they miss the proverbial forest for the trees.  I’m not saying they are rude though.  I’d say the screeners at MCI are as polite as the average KC resident.

If CLT opts of of TSA they will still be required to make everyone take their shoes off, but liquids, gels, and aerosols will still be restricted to 100mL or smaller containers in a quart sized baggie.  They will still follow the whole ID = security farce.  These policies need to change starting with TSA.  If that doesn’t happen, then welcome the new boss, same as the old boss.

How many of you have been to SFO and had no clue those were not actual TSA employees?  I rest my case.

According to the Charlotte Observer the retail operations at CLT is in discussion with The Paradies Shops to open new retail operations in CLT.  This is good news because HMS Host is just so boring and cliche.

The newsstands will be branded with the CNBC name. Other stores likely to come to the airport include Brooks Brothers, PGA Tour Shops and Lacoste.

Judging by the stores the article claims to bring it sounds like these are the people who also run the A Terminal at SMF.  That is pretty nice and I have to admit that I did my holiday shopping the past 2 years at the stores at SMF.

I wish OTG would  bid for the Food and Beverage contract at CLT, maybe they did and weren’t successful.  (Full disclosure, my normal employer has done business with OTG).  As far as sandwich kiosks go I prefer  CIBO Express over the crap HMS host calls a sandwich.  I thought HMS recently changed up their lineup when I recently bought a sandwich in ATL, but it might have been from a Paradies kiosk.  Isn’t it sad that I know airport sandwiches that well?

I am still trying to avoid these things at all costs, but today’s circumstances led me to the machine.

• I was running late leaving my house today due to laundry issues
• I realized about half a mile from my house that I didn’t have my wallet and I had to turn around and go back
• I hadn’t printed my tickets at home (just checked in and printed to PDF)
• the Airtran kiosk takes 5 minutes to locate a PNR

All that transpired and I went to the C check point with about 30 minutes before scheduled boarding so I had a bit of time.  The C check point had about 40 people in line while the D check point had 4 so the were urging people to go over there.  Since I don’t use the elite line while flying AirTran (whether the TDC would stop me or not is not something I’d like to waste time to find out) I decided to go to D.  D is the farthest from AirTran, but all other checkpoints had about the same queue length as C.

I got in line at D and quickly noticed where the body scanner is.  It is the second line from the left of 4 total lines.  The left-most line was moving fastest so I entered it.

The lady in front of me was taking forever to clear the WTMD (belt, hitting the side, who knows) so while I was waiting behind her the lady manning the body scanner asks me if I have anything in my pockets thinking she means just things that would set of the WTMD I say “no” although I have my boarding passes and ID in my pockets.  She then determines I should go through the nude-o-scope instead (why me?  why not the lady who took 3 times to clear the WTMD???)

I politely said “I will not go through that thing”

She says I don’t have to, but I will get a special screening.  I have to wait for about 3 minutes for my special screener, officer Miller, to arrive.  In that time the lady manning the WTMD motions me through so I go through.  The lady manning the body scanner (who had since closed it off anyway) asked me what I was doing.  Well…your coworker let me through I thought, but instead I just made the VERY VALID claim that I was keeping an eye on my stuff since it had long since cleared the x-ray and I had no line of site from where they had me waiting.

Finally Officer Miller arrives and explains front of hand, back of hand, etc.  She was professional.  I wasn’t thinking and assumed a position not looking at my stuff and she quickly turned me around so I could watch my stuff.  She told me right away that I had the right to request a private screening.  Heck no!  If you are going to grope me I’d prefer to be where I have witnesses if  I need them.  She was thorough but not inappropriate so it wasn’t an issue.  There were a lot of things I wanted to say, but since I was approaching 15 minutes before boarding and I had to walk to the opposite end of CLT I didn’t say anything.  The screening ended after massaging my feet (do the body scanners really see the bottoms of my feet?  If not then why are you touching my feet) and taking one of the explosive detecting wipes to my ID, BP, and officer Miller’s gloves.  I came out clean and they let me go.

I wish I had remembered the name of the lady who pulled me aside and forced me through the ordeal.  I paid attention to the TDC and the secondary screener, but missed the other lady’s name.  Her ego was crushed when I didn’t want to play her game and even though she shut her machine down and I cleared the WTMD without an event I still needed to waste 2 officers’ time with my secondary.

I had 2 weeks of office weeks due to projects pushing back so today is my first day back out.  Since the last time I flew they have closed the A Checkpoint in CLT and it is Monday so I was afraid of security lines.  I left my house 2 hours before my scheduled departure and tried to see if there was anything I could do about my 3 hour layover in CVG.  The other options required departing 40 minutes before my scheduled departure so I was afraid I wouldn’t clear security in time and stayed with my original itinerary.

Got through security, waiting for my flight, boarding my flight.  The suspension sounded pretty bad with every bump on taxi sounding like an old car, but I’ve had flights like that before and thought nothing of it.  After takeoff it turns out our landing gear never went up.  Since our takeoff weight was higher than landing weight we had to fly around for about 30 minutes before we could actually land.

I stood in line and tried to fix my connection, but the Delta website didn’t realize we had returned to CLT and just thought we were delayed into CVG so I called the Gold Medallion line.  Delta was able to interline me to a direct flight on US Airways (see previous posts about original mileage credit), but now CLT is under a tornado watch and has severe thunder storms so the ramp is closed.

…hopefully I get out of here eventually

Charlotte Observer Article

Just a friendly reminder…Anything that requires refrigeration is not a good inflight snack
Anything that hasn’t been inspected for vermin is not a good inflight snack
Anything that has a way of finding its way out of the overhead bin should not be put in the overhead bin

I may not like US Airways, but I never imagined they would attract the kind of passenger who would put rotten meat in an overhead. They also don’t deserve this publicity because recently their planes have been very clean.

from Wikipedia

…oh…and if you find out what a Durian is…don’t bring those onboard either. Thanks.

The past 2 times I’ve gone through the First Class/Preferred/Star Gold line in the C check point they have staffed the X-ray machine with trainees.  CLT’s X-ray screeners are always “bag check” happy, but with the trainees it takes at least twice as long to get from the TDC to the end of the conveyor with bags and shoes ready to march to the gate.

The C checkpoint has 2 podiums for TDCs (Travel Document Checkers) and 4 X-ray machines feeding 2 WTMDs (Walk Through Metal Detectors).  The Elite line is on the left side so passengers going through that TDC will usually stay to the left-most lane(s).  Two times in a row the left most X-ray has been staffed by someone in training.  How do I know they are in training?  They are wearing a plain white button-up shirt instead of the blue shirt with the cheesy badge.  The CLT TSOs have had enough issue with my electric toothbrush, but last time the trainee and the trainer spent 3 minutes discussing it.  “It must be a brush of some kind, but the head tapers.” “Yeah, it is a brush, but that handle is weird.”  This week I tossed that toothbrush (because it hadn’t held a charge for months) so my toothbrush didn’t hold me up, but someone behind me did and I had to wait 3 minutes for a supervisor to come look at the X-ray (because the trainer must have no authority and needs someone else to get anything done).  I will reach into the tunnel if my bag is less than 4 inches from the end, but my bag was a good 18 inches back so I stood there.

amazon.com

Maybe they think the elite line is better training grounds since I’d like to think that most people in that line at least know the security prot

ocols.  I think they should let the elites get through as fast at they can so everyone has more time to focus on infrequent flyers who don’t realize you can’t bring a cutlery set through security.

They had been renovating the Check-in area between the B and C checkpoints for a while (the short-lived Midwest check-in area). Now I find out why. Before Delta, United, American, Continental, and Airtran were crammed in between the A and B checkpoints. Now United and Continental have jumped into the area between the B and C checkpoints and they are really emphasizing the Star Alliance affiliation.

I did not wander down to see if any changes have been made to jetBlue, Lufthansa, or US Airways.