Over New Years, we went to Dallas. The DFW Metro area is big, so between dinners, shopping, and family, we did a ton of driving around. At one point, we were at a stoplight, and realized that there were thousands of birds all around us. It was crazy!

Readers, have you seen freaky nature-related things while traveling?

Oh dear. TSA is a never ending source of, “Seriously???” moments. In the last year, stories ranging from hilarious to horrifying have appeared, and now the agency famous for its comedy of errors has struck again.

According to CNN, a TSA agent found a, shall we say, “personal item” in the luggage of a traveler. On the “TSA has searched your bag” paper, he wrote the woman a special note: “Get your freak on girl.” OMG. I mean, O. M. G. Can you imagine? It’s hideously inappropriate, offensive, disgusting….. and yet mildly hilarious. While you gasp in horrified laughter, you wonder what kind of idiot could possibly think this would be acceptable. And did he think he wouldn’t get found out? Has he done this before, and just not been caught?

The officer in question is facing dismissal, of course. But when the woman who received the note tweeted the pic to her followers, she said she wanted to raise the issue of what this means in the grander sense of things.

“As much as this is a funny and titillating story, when I put the note on Twitter for what I thought was a relatively limited audience, I was hoping it would open up a bigger conversation about privacy rights (or lack thereof) in post-9/11 America. It unfortunately hasn’t done that, and instead has turned into a media circus,” she said.

I think she raises a valid point. While personally I have had never had a terrible interaction with the TSA (just mildly annoying ones), there are clearly several bad apples that are creating issues for everyone else. Most of the agents are probably doing the best they can, but there seem to be many systemic issues flowing from the top down.

So, Readers, what do you think this says about privacy rights these days? Or is the idea that we have any privacy the biggest joke of all?

(P.S.: Home Warrior had an awesome name suggestion for this post, which was hilarious, but I just couldn’t do it: “Not-so Good Vibrations”. Hah! He is on a roll. Remember “Snakes on a Plane?“)

Okay, this is hilarious. Going back to my friends’ story a few weeks ago about fellow passengers joining the mile high club….. I was sent this fabulous article from reader Sylvia. Apparently another couple tried for the same thing, but it got turned into a much bigger deal…..

From Jezebel:

The tenth anniversary of 9/11 was an unwise day for an in-flight romantic adventure, as a couple learned. After their frequent trips to the bathroom raised suspicions on a Frontier Airlines flight, the FBI was called to investigate suspicious behavior and two fighter jets took to the skies to monitor the plane. Law enforcement sources told ABC News that the actual reason for the bathroom visits was “making out.”

It does make you wonder–going to the lav frequently makes you look suspicious? What if you just drank a lot of water? Or you’re sick? Or something else? Anyway, the next time you think about joining this particular club, just remember that you could end your day in police custody.

The Home Warrior and I were driving to San Antonio to see his parents a few weeks ago, and were listening to one of my favorite NPR shows, Car Talk. One of the callers, who lived in New York,  said that her significant other (boyfriend? husband? I don’t remember) refused to wear his seat belt while driving in the city. His rationale? He wanted to be able to slide over to the other seat should a car be about to hit him on the driver’s side. Uh, that is possibly the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. First of all, the likelihood of you having the superhero-fast reflexes to move out of the way if a car is coming are nil. Second, the possibility that you’ll get hit in another way (front, back, etc) is just as high as from the driver’s side–and you definitely want your seat belt on if you get hit from those directions! Third, what if you have a passenger?? Luckily the Car Talk guys agreed with me, so I didn’t have to write them a letter. For those of you who would like to listen to it, here is the link.

It was just so insane! Have you ever heard anything like this before? Goodness. Let’s be safe, people!

And to finish off the week with a few random thoughts…..

I love the Old Navy sweater that Lisa from Privilege posted over at Corporette for Frugal Friday. It’s $20, comes in a ton of colors, is nice and long, and is a great budget-friendly travel staple. The comments all say that it holds up pretty well, which makes the $20 seem like a steal.

Finally, ACL Festival starts today and I am SO EXCITED. I have a new favorite–Charles Bradley. Listening to him right now, he does soul in a way that makes you feel it. Very James Brown-esque, in the best possible way. I highly recommend you check him out.

This past weekend some good friends came into town. As we were hugging hello, my friend said, “Have I got a story for you!!” And boy, was she right. For the sake of the story, we will call these friends John and Jane.

John and Jane were flying in from California, with a layover in the middle.  They got on board the second leg, found their seats, and were settling in with their one-year old son when a man sat in front of them. He noticed a woman coming on board and yelled, “Hey there! Weren’t you at the bar a few minutes ago? Come sit over here!” The woman came and sat, and they started talking loudly about their homes and spouses. Jane remembers thinking, Oh great, drunk people. Hope they don’t wake the baby up! Of course, if it had ended there it wouldn’t be so interesting. While the plane was taxiing, the woman scooted over so she was sitting right next to the man. During takeoff, they started making out. And once the seat belt sign went off (you may have guessed this part) they went into the bathroom…..together.

The flight was only about a third full, so it was pretty apparent to a lot of people what was going on. In fact, the woman sitting across from them was so offended that she told a flight attendant, who then went and banged on the bathroom door. Which of course did nothing. John kept an eye on his watch, and by his count it was a good fourteen minutes before the man came out and sat down, with the woman following soon after. To make the story even worse, or sadder, or whatever, once they arrived and got off the plane, John went into the bathroom at the airport. He thought he was alone, until he heard a cell phone ring, and heard the guy from the plane talking to a friend. “No, we arrived on time. I’m just in the bathroom, hiding out from a woman I banged on the airplane.” <<Facepalm.>>

Not surprisingly, I have a lot of thoughts about this situation. First of all, I know that the mile-high club exists, but it would never occur to me that people would try to join on a 60 minute daytime flight. It seems like something that lends itself more to overnight flights, when people are sleeping. Or at least can’t see what’s really going on. Second, airplane bathrooms are tiny and super gross. I tried to figure out the mechanics, but it made my brain hurt so I let it go. And then the flight attendant banging on the door in the middle? I’m trying not to think about the part that they’re married…..to other people. Oy.

In all my flights, I have never seen anything like this. Maybe because I try to tune out the people around me, or because I’m always reading my book or working. But it makes me wonder–is this common? Have you guys ever noticed anything like this going on?

(P.S. The Home Warrior wanted me to call this post “Snakes on a Plane.” I laughed hysterically but couldn’t do it.)

I stayed at a Hilton outside of Boston a couple of weeks ago. It was perfectly fine, although my “balcony” overlooked the indoor pool, and I didn’t have any natural light in my room. That was weird. But they must have gone through some recent remodeling. As I was walking through the underground parking garage, I saw a large section of spaces cordoned off. At first I thought they were speakers, then as I got closer I realized they were TVs. At least twenty, maybe thirty, of them, lined up very precisely, huge and bulky. It was so bizarre! Wonder what they will do with them…..

What in the world?

Readers, what is something weird you’ve seen on a trip?

Hard to believe this blog has been around for two years already! Wow. This has been an incredibly fulfilling and wonderful experience.  The past year has seen so many exciting projects, including various guest posts for blogs I love and admire, writing regularly for Via-Her, being interviewed, mentioned, and quoted in some major places, and working with great companies to create content. Boarding Area, as always, has been amazing to be a part of. And readership has increased by 300%, which I am honored and humbled by.

Two years ago I started this blog because there were not enough quality resources for women business travelers. Now, not only have we answered so many questions for women (what to pack? how to pack? how to look professional on a plane? etc), but together we have created a supportive, helpful community for anyone who travels for business, men and women. Thank you for reading, commenting, emailing, and sharing Road Warriorette with friends. There is a lot of very cool stuff coming up this year, so I hope you’ll stick with me!

This story is so bad I don’t want to read it again to edit it….. so here it is in its entirety. A horrible travel experience from one of my friends. <<shudder>>

So I was flying home from Durham and was on the short portion (DFW to AUS) when they moved my seat at the very last minute.  No problem.  In fact, it seemed I had the whole row to myself. But when I sat down, I did notice a funny smell.  I looked around, sniffed some more, wasn’t sure as it wasn’t that bad and sort just smelled like “late night plane.”  Then throughout the trip I kept having something rolling around at my heels.  But I thought it was the luggage of the person behind me.  So I would sort of kick it back.  Until, I saw that the bottoms of my jeans were wet–up from the hem for about 4 inches.   I was puzzled, finally looked directly under my seat, and saw that what had been at my heels the whole time was a now degrading used airsickness bag.  So it was someone else’s vomit on my heels.  awesome.

I freaked (i have kind of a phobia about vomit, so while no one “likes” it…i REALLY don’t), told the attendant, who barely looked up from her texting to ask the person behind me if the airsickness bag she had found on her seat was used too.  It wasn’t.  She never apologized, just said she would have to call someone to clean it up.

I was pissed at this point and in an uncharacteristic fashion went directly to the gate attendant (it was by now 11 PM so no time to wash my hands first–or rip off my disgusting clothes, lest she disappear too.)  She freaked.  And I quote: “Oh yes, that is deeply disgusting.  Plus those are bodily fluids so you don’t know what blood and fluid born illnesses you were exposed to.”  Well exactly.

So she said I had to contact the website to complain.  I did.  And I got a big 3,000 bonus miles for my trouble along with a condescending letter about how the planes are white glove clean in the morning and it isn’t their fault if things get messed up along the way.  Right.

Readers, any awful stories you want to share?

During my trip from Hell to Ohio last month, I met a nice guy. He was a fellow business traveler, on his way home from Germany. He told me a story that was interesting, but scary, and I thought I would share.

After a grueling 9 day work trip in Berlin, he finally got on the plane home. When he got to his seat, there was a gentleman sitting in it. He said, “Excuse me, I think you’re in my seat.” The other gentleman pulled out his ticket, and said, “Hmmm. My ticket says this is the correct seat.” They both went up to the flight attendant and explained the situation. This is when they realized that this guy not only had the same seat as my new friend, but his ticket had my new friend’s name on it. In fact, it was the exact same ticket. This man had gone through security and gotten on the flight with a ticket not in his name, and no one had noticed.

As I write this out, I realize how preposterous it sounds. I really, really hope that this guy that I met was punch drunk and exhausted and made the whole thing up, because otherwise it is just too scary.

Recently, some close friends visited California. One of the stops they made was the Blue Diamond Almond Company in Sacramento, where they picked up some almond butter. My friend H was very excited about this souvenir, and couldn’t wait to take it back to Texas and enjoy it. Being followers of this blog, and frequent travelers themselves, they of course carried their suitcases on. As they were going through security, they took out their plastic bag of toiletries and laptops, and took off their shoes like they are supposed to. So you can imagine their surprise when the TSA agents called for a bag check, and pulled out the…….almond butter? Really? They were given the option of tossing it or mailing it to themselves. As their plane was to start boarding soon, they elected to toss it. Lame.

On the TSA website, they do state that peanut butter (so almond butter too, I would assume) needs to go in checked luggage. Okay, thanks for putting that out there. But is almond butter a liquid? They say it’s “spreadable”, so along with cheese spreads it can’t be carried on. It definitely is spreadable, so if that is what defines a liquid then it’s a liquid. I just never would equate peanut butter with, say, water. Or lotion. Or even lipstick, which would be a liquid if it melted. But then again, regular cheese would be a liquid if melted too, and I have taken cheddar cheese through security on many occasions. Okay I just confused myself into a circle. For now, TSA holds the cards so we have to do what they say. Even if it doesn’t necessarily make sense…..

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about the frustrating trip I had to Ohio. I called it Part II because it was the second frustrating trip I have had to Ohio.  Here is the story of the first. (And again, I don’t really hate Ohio. Really.)

When I first arrived in Columbus, it seemed like everything was going to go smoothly. It was December, but there was no snow and the night was crisp and beautiful. I found the highway quickly, and had my MapQuest directions in hand (before I had a GPS) as I started the two-hour drive. I followed them perfectly, and was feeling good after the first hour of driving. Things went downhill from there though.  I got lost, wandering around the hills that border Ohio and West Virginia. I stopped to ask for directions, and the gas station clerk seemed shocked I was taking the route that I was. I ended up driving back and forth over the river, finally calling the hotel in desperation. The woman told me where to go, and then my phone went dead. (I also did not have a car phone charger. Of course.) Praying that I would remember the specifics, I kept going. Three and a half hours after I left the airport, I arrived at the hotel. As I was going to bed that night I thought, tomorrow will be fine as long as it doesn’t snow.

Famous last words. I woke up to a world covered in white fluff. Now remember, I am from Texas. We don’t have snow in Texas, and if we ever get an ice storm my city shuts down. I do NOT know how to drive in snow. Naively hopeful, I called my contact to see if the office was closed. She laughed. After getting ready (and praying just a little) I left for the office. Luckily, it was very close and I managed to get there without incident.

After successfully completing my meetings, I left to head back to the airport, with the advice and warnings I had received about driving in snow circling my head. Go slowly. Don’t slam on the breaks. If you skid, turn into the skid. Lots of room between you and the car in front of you. Etc. I left early, and had five hours before my flight. This turned out to be very lucky because it took me four and a half hours to get to the airport. I drove along at 15-20 mph, down snowy highways and small mountain roads. At one point we were delayed for an hour because of an accident. It was in. sane. Remembering, of course, that I don’t know how to drive on the snow. So I was extremely tense during the entire drive, and when I finally reached Columbus was incredibly grateful. Until I missed my exit.

At this point I freaked out. I was exhausted, tense, and SO ready to get on that plane and head home. When I called my company’s travel department for help, the very nice woman calmed me down and looked up the directions to the airport from where I was. “I’m never going back to Ohio!” I told her. “If I call you guys and tell you I have to go there, you say no!” Probably not my best moment.

I finally got to the airport. My flight was supposed to leave in fifteen minutes, but, in my first stroke of luck for the day, was delayed. The second stroke of luck was getting my upgrade. It’s amazing what a first class seat and a glass of wine can do for the psyche. When I finally did make it home, I crawled into bed. Right before I passed out I thought, I am never going back there.

And I managed to avoid Ohio for almost three years……