Time for another edition of, “Is This Rude?”

Over the past several months, I have noticed something happening more and more often. People are boarding planes, trying to shove their rollaboards into the overhead bins, and they just won’t fit. So they climb up onto the seat to push it in. Then they get down and merrily walk on their way to their own seat. Honestly, I’ve been kind of appalled. I guess I see seats in planes like someone’s chair—chairs that are really close together, but chairs nonetheless. The idea of standing on someone’s chair would never occur to me, for any reason, but I’ve seen it happen on four of my last ten flights. In my opinion, if your bag won’t fit in the overhead bin it’s too full and you need to take something out or gate check it. When I think about all of the stuff that gets on people’s shoes, it icks me out to think of that same stuff on my chair! Really, the only thing I think is even a partial justification is if someone is very short, but even then, I don’t really like it.

Readers, what do you think? Is this rude? Or am I naïve for thinking that people should treat airplane seats like chairs?

It has become clear to me that a lot of travelers are not clear on how to get to a non-aisle seat politely. I’ve covered it before, but after a recent flight I figure a rehash is in order. On this particular flight a few weeks ago I had the aisle seat, and when I got to my row I stowed my bag and sat down with my book. I never put my seatbelt on until everyone is seated so I can stand up and get out of the way easily. As I sat there reading my book, I noticed out of the corner of my eye that the line wasn’t moving anymore. I glanced up and realized there was a young guy standing there, just staring at me. He hadn’t said anything, so who knows how long it would have taken me to see him if I had been more into my book! I quickly jumped up and he slid into the window seat without a word.

A few minutes later, I was reading my book again when someone just started squeezing in front of me. It completely took me by surprise—I didn’t even see the woman come up! I said, “Hang on a minute!” and again jumped up to get out of the way.

When I have to get into the middle or window seat, I will smile at the person in the aisle-seat and say, “Hi! I’m sitting there.” Then I pause, giving them a chance to get up. If by chance someone doesn’t move I will ask them politely if they mind getting up. Sometimes they ask if they should get up, but typically people are happy to stand up and move out of your way. After all, it’s part of the deal with flying.

Readers, what is your experience with the middle and window seat? Do people usually stand up (or wait for you to stand up)?

Let’s play another game of “Was this rude?”! The last time I asked this question we had a great discussion. This morning while flying to Dallas I saw something that seemed questionable to me etiquette-wise. This situation is (IMO) definitely not as controversial as last time, but I still thought I would put it out to the community.

This morning I flew on American to Dallas. I boarded with the Elites, and got comfortable in my window seat. A guy sat in the aisle seat, but didn’t put on his seatbelt or get stuff out—I assume he was waiting to see if someone needed the middle seat. As time passed, the plane (and overhead bins) got more and more full. Eventually I heard a women say, “Mind if I slip in front of you?” and moved (without waiting for an answer) into the space between the guy and the seat in front of him. He assumed (as did I) that the woman needed to get into the middle seat, and moved to stand up and get out of her way. “Oh, don’t get up,” she said. “I’m just waiting to get to my seat up there. I had to put my bag way in the back!” So, the guy just kind of sat there awkwardly while the woman stood very very close to him and waited to get to the front of the plane.

I’m of two minds about this. On the one hand, I’ve seen flight attendants do it often and it doesn’t seem rude then. Plus, well, if you have to get to the front of the plane how else can you do it? But it just seems like it would be super uncomfortable for both parties. Of course, the woman didn’t seem uncomfortable at all, like she did this all the time.

Readers, what do you think? Is it rude to stand in the row in front of someone? What could she have done instead? What would you have done?

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I have seen some very kind things on airplanes. People giving up their seats so couples can sit together, passengers helping others put their bags in the overhead bin, smiles, and all around good cheer. I have also seen less nice things, and unfortunately coming home from Cancun there were a lot of non-nice actions to witness. Wonder why! Were people mad about coming home from vacation? Or hungover from the night before? Who knows. But something must have been going on, because I have never before seen this level of rudeness on one flight.

First, there were several pre-board passengers. That is a normal enough occurrence—a few elderly people, a guy in a wheelchair and his family, etc. Did not seem, to me, like anything out of the ordinary. But the people waiting to board were very impatient, making comments under their breath (or out loud) such as, “Does it really take that long to board?” Um, yes, for some people, it does take that long to board, and I’m pretty sure that is exactly why airlines have preboarding! But whatever.

When they called First Class to board (Home Warrior and I were lucky enough to get upgraded), a lot of people tried to board that were not in First. Not so surprising, again, as that happens everywhere. But I was very surprised at how the passengers in First handled it, although maybe I shouldn’t have been after the comments I heard during preboarding. They were angry—like noticeably angry. Multiple people made rude comments, not even trying to keep their voices down, about people in front of them. I get it—you want to get on the plane and get settled. But it felt like these people were seriously overreacting.

Then, while actually boarding, Home Warrior and I were behind a couple on the jetbridge. We were all waiting pretty patiently, until another passenger walked past us and the other couple, pushed in front of the family in front of them (who were picking up their bags to board), and got on the plane. At this point, Home Warrior and I were both wondering what the heck was going on. Yeah, the guy had no bags, and everyone else did, but the whole idea of waiting in line is that you wait for the people in front of you!!

Okay. So we’re finally on the plane, about to get to our seats, wondering what will happen next. The woman standing in front of us, who is sitting in the bulkhead, is looking for a place to stow her backpack. She sees a spot in front of another bag, and puts her bag up. The door to the overhead bin won’t close though, so she starts shoving her bag in as hard as she can. Repeatedly. Which wouldn’t be a big deal, except that she was crushing some other person’s bag in the process. The owner of that bag (also sitting in the bulkhead) jumps up and says, “Excuse me! Please don’t do that, there is glass in there!” The woman rolls her eyes, says, “Whatever,” and moves her bag to the next bin.

At this point I swear my eyes were about to pop out of my head. Luckily they didn’t, because as I was trying to put my own bag in the overhead bin, the person behind me shoved past so hard that I fell over. I caught myself on the back of my seat, and so didn’t hurt myself, but still. Come on, people! There’s just no call for that.

You would think that people returning from vacation would be relaxed and mellow, but not this time. Rude, rude, rude.

Readers, have you been on a flight where it seems like everyone got up on the wrong side of the bed?

This may be another one of those things that, like grabbing the seat in front of you, if you don’t fly often you don’t think about it. But after almost every flight I’ve taken over the last few weeks, someone has stopped abruptly, right in front of me, in the middle of the jetbridge (or the space right outside of it).  Maybe people are trying so hard to get off the plane that they don’t arrange their belongings in a comfortable way, and they need to stop and fix them? Or they want to get their phone/keys/wallet/etc. out of their bag? Regardless of the reason, it can cause a logjam, or even someone to run into you. I came this close to running into someone who stopped right in the middle of the path outside the jetbridge on Saturday.

This is true for the airport in general, and really any place where there is a hallway or walkway used by lots of people at a time. If you need to stop, glance around you and then move to the side without running into anyone. I actually treat it like driving–I look to my blind spot, then get out of the way. Sometimes there are extenuating circumstances, but please, move over to the side if you have to stop.

My best friend had quite the interesting trip home from Atlanta last month. You’ve already heard about the gate changes she had to deal with, but that was way better than what happened actually on her flight.

She sits down in her seat, gets comfy, and goes to sleep. After about half an hour, she keeps hearing funny noises that wake her up. Click. She looks around. Click. What the heck is that? Click, click, click….. She finally stands up to stretch her legs, and to see if she can figure out where the noise is coming from. It turns out that it is a woman, behind her, clipping her fingernails. With an actual fingernail clipper. When she told me this story, my immediate response was, “No way.” I just couldn’t believe that anyone would do that. But I was wrong, because that woman was clipping her fingernails. On the plane. Wow.

Friends, please do not do this. Ever. In fact, I would say don’t clip your fingernails in public, ever. But on a plane, in my opinion, it is even more offensive due to the close proximity everyone has with their neighbor. Can you imagine sitting next to someone clipping their nails? <<shudder>> Filing your nails is better, but I don’t think I would do that on a plane either. Again, the proximity.

Readers, what is the rudest thing you’ve ever seen while traveling?