February 17
I feel a change in the air…
There’s nothing wrong with change. They say that change comes to all things. We human beings dread change. There is something comforting in the status quo, like a warm receiving blanket or the heat of a crackling fire on a cold night.
I have to admit that I’m somewhat torn. On the one hand, I have been subjected to change all my life. With my father’s military service bouncing us all over the country my entire pre-adult life, I got used to drastic changes in my life as our family was uprooted time and again.
On the other hand, however, I have over my lifetime, looked forward to change and accepted it as a new challenge…like exploring a new frontier never-before encountered. And in that vein, I have been able to face change, for good or ill, with excitement and acceptance.
As I have aged, though, I find it harder and harder to embrace change, especially when it feels like it won’t be pretty. It’s like a dread hanging over me that I somehow knew was coming somewhere around the corner, but hoped it was a corner I could avoid.
Today was a real test of my internal fortitude. To start with, I had gotten on a flight to my home base in San Francisco that would have gotten me to my trip a little over 4 hours before my check-in. As it turned out, we circled SFO for almost 2 hours, then were force to divert to Santa Barbara to get more fuel and get a new departure time. Air Traffic Control gave us the bad news…we would not be leaving until 12:20, an entire 30 minutes AFTER my required show time. Unfortunately too, my trip was little affected my all the delays into and out of SFO this morning so it left shortly before I arrived.
Knowing now that I will probably face disciplinary measures for having missed the trip, I decided to settle in for the day to see if I might be able to make up the time. As it turns out, our regional jet carrier snapped the screen on my laptop computer and I was informed today that they are not liable for the damage, since electronic devices are excluded from their limits of liability.
When things happen to us, I try to find the good in it to bring my self to accept that change and embrace the new with optimism and forward thinking. There have been times in my life that change came over me and I was ill-prepared or caught off-guard and having no control over that which overtook me, I lifted myself up and worked with what life had doled out to me, knowing full-well that I was walking in new territory and feeling inadequate to resolve it.
I still feel as though change can be a good thing and help us to grow as individuals, but I am uncertain of the future that this change will bring me. I feel as though I have been working on a puzzle for so long and discovering that I will never finish it to completion because there are too many pieces missing.
I hope that is not the case, but if it is, and I am forced to face and embrace this change, then I ask the universe to watch my back, shore up my footing and point me in the newer, and hopefully BETTER direction.





