Unless the International Olympic Committee acts fast and makes heaving overweight carry-on bags into overhead airplane bins an official Olympic sport, my chances of visiting Beijing this summer are nil.

But if committee members do finally come to their senses, I’m ready to go. I’ve been practicing my technique on plane trips with multiple connections. And I’ve been prepping for free time in Beijing by gathering advice on how to be a well-mannered traveler in China.

Find out what I learned about spitting, squat toilets, staying safe, and slurping soup in China in this week’s Well Mannered Traveler column on MSNBC.com.

(Column illustration by the very talented Duane Hoffmann / msnbc.com)

Do higher fares, new baggage check fees, and the inevitable long lines at the security checkpoints have you dreading your next trip to the airport?

Maybe I can help: here’s a link to the Well-Mannered Traveler summer refresher course posted today on MSNBC.com. There’s even a chance to earn extra credit.

Column illustration by Duane Hoffman at MSNBC.com

So you pay through the nose for an airline ticket, fly across country on an overstuffed airplane, and make your way into town hoping to spend a few hours viewing treasures in a quiet museum gallery. But when you arrive, the museum is filled with hordes of school kids on a year-end field trip.

Find out what to do about it in my Well-Mannered Traveler column posted today on MSNBC.com – complete with cool artwork by Duane hoffmann from msnbc.com.