Frequent Flyer Funnies: The Mileometer Mystery

by BoardingArea | October 4, 2024 | 0 Comments

Welcome back to another edition of #FrequentFlyerFunnies, where we uncover the humor in the highs and lows of air travel! This week, we’re exploring the whimsical world of imaginary gadgets with the “Mileometer”—a device that captures the emotional saga of every frequent traveler. Buckle up for some laughs!

A cartoon depicts a scene at an airport gate labeled "Gate 6A." A sign above reads "Travel Quiz." Several people are interacting with a machine that resembles a polygraph, operated by a person behind a counter. The machine is connected to a man with a Hawaiian shirt. Below, text humorously describes the machine's functions: A) Records your heartbeat while waiting for upgrade clearance. B) Records your voice volume when your program changes its rules again. C) Records your blood pressure when you're denied a free award seat. D) All of the above. A caption at the bottom reads: "The TSA and Secret Service use magnetometers, but have you ever seen a mileometer being used? Now you can say you have."

What the Comic Shows:

In today’s humorous take, we find ourselves at airport Gate 6A, where the “Travel Quiz” is in full swing. Travelers face a machine resembling a polygraph, humorously named the “Mileometer,” operated by an attendant behind the counter. This gadget boasts the ability to record a traveler’s heartbeat as they await upgrade clearance, their voice volume when their frequent flyer program changes its rules, and their blood pressure when denied a free award seat. It’s an exaggerated, yet eerily familiar, portrayal of the stress every frequent traveler knows too well.

Punchline:

“The TSA and Secret Service use magnetometers, but have you ever seen a mileometer being used? Now you can say you have.”

Why We’re Chuckling:

This comic nails the emotional turmoil frequent flyers endure. The Mileometer captures the frenetic energy of travel frustrations—be it waiting for that elusive upgrade, facing program changes, or missing out on an award seat. It’s a hilarious reminder of the ridiculous yet relatable ups and downs of flying. The concept of a stress-measuring device pokes fun at how we all sometimes wish there were tangible ways to handle travel tensions.

Dive Deeper with Us:

  • Travel Tensions: Have you ever found yourself anxiously counting down the minutes, hoping your name gets called for an upgrade? Share your most intense gate-side moments where suspense kept your heart racing.
  • Program Puzzle: Frequent flyer programs changing their rules can catch us off guard. What’s the most jaw-dropping change you’ve experienced? How did it alter your travel game?
  • Denied Delights: Nothing feels quite like the sting of being denied a free award seat. What near-misses or frustrating moments have you faced at the gate? Let’s share and find some humor in the disappointment.
  • Innovative Imaginations: The Mileometer sparked our imagination, but what other fun, fictional gadgets would exaggerate the travel experience even more? Share your creative ideas for dealing with the rigors of air travel.
  • Airline Anxiety Alleviators: If you could invent a device to alleviate the stress of flying, what would it do? From calming nerves to ensuring every upgrade, share your dream travel gadget concepts.
  • Frequent Flyer Therapy: Travel can push us to the brink. What’s the most unusual thing you’ve done to stay calm amid frequent flying frustrations? Whether it’s finding a yoga spot in a bustling terminal or meditating near a baggage carousel, tell us your coping tales.

In this week’s #FrequentFlyerFunnies, we’re reminded that though flying often tests our patience, humor is a trusty travel companion. Embrace the quirks, expect the unexpected, and let laughter lead the way. Until next time, may your upgrades be frequent, and your travel troubles be few!

Frequent Flyer Funnies
Also on BoardingArea
Frequent Miler
Estimated first year value
The best way to earn miles and points (or even cash back) quickly is through credit card welcome bonuses. Many cards offer big bonuses for those who are approved and meet the offer’s minimum spend requirements. In order to help you decide which offers are best, we calculate each card’s...
Points With a Crew
Use 1 Amex Membership Reward and get up to 40% off at Amazon (targeted)
Act fast if you want to get 20% off your Amazon purchases, possibly even including gift cards. Find out how by ...
Frequent Flyer Bonuses
Southwest Rapid Rewards members can buy Frontier Airlines Elite Gold Status for $40
Next up in the “let’s go after disgruntled travelers from other airlines” saga is Frontier Airlines going after disheartened Southwest flyers. However, Frontier are going one step further than most of the offers we have seen of late in that this isn’t a status match. They are actually letting any...
The Gate with Brian Cohen
Gratuities For Robots and When Your Vehicle Is Impounded?
Society in the United States has apparently gotten to the point where gratuities for robots and when your vehicle is impounded are not only requested; but also expected. Purchasing office furniture and items via a drive-thru business purportedly does not automatically exempt you from the practice of giving extra money...
Frequent Miler
Hyatt Centric New Orleans French Quarter: Bottom Line Review
New Orleans is one of my favorite cities in the US, a wonderful combination of great music, terrific people, delicious food, and some of the best people-watching around. Oddly, although I’ve spent quite a bit of time there over the years, my wife had never visited at length, so we...
View from the Wing
[ENDS SOON] 200,000 Points & Platinum Status—IHG’s Biggest-Ever Card Offer Just Dropped
The card is clearly worth getting for this bonus offer alone. And its $99 annual fee is worth it on an ongoing basis, because you receive an anniversary free night for IHG Hotels & Resorts. And, when cardholders redeem points for a consecutive four-night IHG hotel stay, the fourth...
One Mile at a Time
Air New Zealand’s New Business Class Debuting May 2025
In June 2022, Air New Zealand formally revealed the details of its new business class product, after teasing it for a couple of years. Air New Zealand is actually refreshing all of its cabins on the Boeing 787 (including introducing the innovative Skynest on a subfleet of them), but in...
Your Mileage May Vary
Passenger’s Sneaky Revenge on Adult-Aged Seat Kicker Was *Chef’s Kiss*
The few times I flew with my mother, I discovered she was not the best passenger on earth. If there was a little kid behind her, kicking her seat, she’d…
The Bulkhead Seat
Cash Grab: Hilton Looks to Offer Late Checkout Across Brands, But It Will Cost You
Hilton Honors does not currently guarantee elite members late checkout. The late check-out benefit… The post Cash Grab: Hilton Looks to Offer Late Checkout Across Brands, But It Will Cost You appeared first on The Bulkhead Seat.
Frequent Miler
Frontier offers Gold Status to Southwest Rapid Rewards members for $40
Yet another competitor is targeting potentially erstwhile Southwest customers. Frontier Airlines has launched a promotion that allows any Southwest Rapid Rewards customer to upgrade to Frontier Gold status through the remainder of 2025 for only $40. Compared to what other major carriers are doing to target Southwest, this is unique...
The Bulkhead Seat
ANA and Singapore Airlines Deepen Joint Venture and Look to Offer Enhanced Benefits
All Nippon Airways (ANA) and Singapore Airlines are both members of Star Alliance. They… The post ANA and Singapore Airlines Deepen Joint Venture and Look to Offer Enhanced Benefits appeared first on The Bulkhead Seat.
Miles To Memories
When Using Hilton Gift Cards Goes Wrong
Like many of you, I have a stack of Hilton gift cards to consume. Unsurprisingly, it's not always easy to do so at Hilton properties. The post When Using Hilton Gift Cards Goes Wrong appeared first on Miles to Memories.
View from the Wing
Hilton Standardizes $40–$60 Late Checkout Fees Across All Brands in 2026 — Honors Elite Benefit To Devalue
Hilton has a new property system coming onboard to merchandise various aspects of your stay. One of the things they’re standardizing is how hotels upsell late check-out. The price for a confirmed late checkout will be set by brand. Continue reading Hilton Standardizes $40–$60 Late Checkout Fees Across All Brands in...
Altitude Yes
Review: Hyatt Centric Fanueil Hall Boston
This Hyatt Centric is located in the heart of Boston, with modern interiors and friendly staff. The post Review: Hyatt Centric Fanueil Hall Boston first appeared on Altitude Yes.
Miles To Memories
New Amex Business Platinum Bonus Available Through Referrals, Earn Up to 250K Points + $500 Credit
The Amex Business Platinum card has a new bonus of 250,000 with an extra $500 credit for flight booked directly with airlines or via Amex Travel. The offer is available through referral links. The post New Amex Business Platinum Bonus Available Through Referrals, Earn Up to 250K Points + $500 Credit...
Points With a Crew
Should you buy Hilton points with (up to) a 100% bonus?
Buying points can be a great way to boost your balance, but only if makes sense financially! Does the new Hilton promotion fit that criteria?
ATX Jetsetter
Emirates Celebrates Easter With An Eggstravagant Menu
Emirates is serving special dishes onboard select flights and in its lounges around the world to celebrate the Easter holiday. The post Emirates Celebrates Easter With An Eggstravagant Menu appeared first on ATX Jetsetter.
Your Mileage May Vary
You Can Cancel a Barclays Credit Card Without Calling. Here’s How I Did It
One of my 2025 resolutions was to cancel 25% of the credit cards we hold. Between duplicate cards and ones we don’t use anymore, it made sense to trim the…
Frequent Miler
Amex Business Platinum Welcome: 150K + $500 off flights
The current welcome offer for the American Express Business Platinum card has increased, and is now offering the same 150,000 points with the added sweetener of a $500 statement credit after purchasing $2,500+ of flights directly through airlines or via AmexTravel.com within the first three months. This offer also has...
Live and Let’s Fly
“It Was Sheer Terror!” Marriott Handed Over Room Key To Predator Who Claimed To Be Guest’s Husband
A doctor has shared a harrowing story, claiming that Marriott handed over a room key to access her room to a predator who claimed to be her husband. Marriott Gave Room Key To Predator Who Claimed To Be Guest’s Husband Without Verification Dr. Vivian Stamatopoulos was staying at a Marriott...
One Mile at a Time
Air New Zealand Retrofitting Entire Boeing 787 Fleet With New Interiors
It’s an exciting time for Air New Zealand, as the Star Alliance carrier is in the process of retrofitting its entire Boeing 787 Dreamliner fleet with new interiors. I want to provide an update on this project, as the first jet has now been reconfigured.
Miles To Memories
Avianca Amex Elite Card from Cardless Has New 100,000 Miles Bonus
Cardless and Avianca have launched a new 100K miles offer on the Avianca Amex Elite Card which has a $249 annual fee. The post Avianca Amex Elite Card from Cardless Has New 100,000 Miles Bonus appeared first on Miles to Memories.
View from the Wing
Knife‑Wielding American Hijacks Tropic Air Flight Over Belize—Heroic Pilot and Passenger Save All Onboard
A Tropic Air flight from Corozal Town to San Pedro in Belize was hijacked by an American brandishing a knife this morning. He seized control of the small Caravan aircraft and held it “at the mercy” of his threats. The morning flight carried 11 passengers, and shortly after takeoff, 49‑year‑old...
Your Mileage May Vary
Dallas/Ft. Worth Area One Step Closer to Having 3rd Commercial Airport
The Dallas-Fort Worth Area is big.  As the 3rd fastest growing U.S. metro in 2024, and one of the ten most populous counties in the country, it is seemingly getting…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Categories

Our Bloggers