When love is in the air, sometimes it takes off. Other times it crash lands. Not everyone gets a fairytale ending. Add online dating into the mix, and romance can get tricky and worse, it can get mean.
When Idaho-based Jake Piper (@jake1911) initially planned his trip to Tampa, he thought he was going to make a possible love connection. And it’s possible he did. Just not with a human.
Piper, who calls himself “The Go Do Stuff Guy” typically posts TikTok content where he’s going out, making new friends and overcoming his self-described “introvert” tendencies. But after the woman he’d been talking to for five months didn’t show up to their planned Tampa rendez vous, he took to social media to tell his story. From there, it ballooned into a multi-part tale.
It all kicked off when Piper sat down, “I’m not a big fan of posting dating stories on here, but I feel like I need to get this one off of my chest,” he says. Then continues, “The past five months, I’ve been talking to this girl, FaceTiming all that.”
He says things were going well, and since she lived in another state, she wanted to show him around Tampa, her hometown. So they picked some dates and planned a trip. He booked his flight, and all seemed to be going well. But about five days before his trip, when she stopped communicating. “She ghosted me,” he said.
In addition to the ghosting, he had to deal with getting refunds. According to Piper though, all of his bookings were nonrefundable.
The solution? Explore Tampa.
The entire comments section comes out in support of the solo traveler. Multiple offers to hang out, suggestions on where to go in Tampa, and several people urging him to hang out with one commenter who told him she was free.
“Well if you don’t happen to have Tampa plans tomorrow night, I’m free,” said Fallonbalogh.
“That’s so horrible. Tampa is great! Go to St. Pete beach or downtown St. Pete,” suggested Cat1248756.
Then, there’s a potential friendship connection waiting for him when he gets back to Idaho. Kameron_takagi said, “Bro I saw you’re a Packers fan! I live in the Boise area if you ever wanted to check out a game at Hyde’s Park and Grill, it’s a great environment!”
His video has been watched 523,500 times, and it reached radio and television stations. It even drew the attention of a Tampa radio station, and a Boise television station (KTVB). So Piper’s been on a quasi-speaking tour.
In an email to BoardingArea, Piper told us he had a wonderful adventure in Tampa: “I ended up having a great time exploring! I went to a couple areas in Tampa (Ybor City, Channelside, Hyde Park, downtown) and also went to St. Pete to check out the beaches and downtown.”
When asked if the woman he’d been talking to ever offered an explanation, he said he never heard from her again. His advice for dating in the 21st century? “I guess my advice for online dating would be to use it as a secondary resource. Prioritize meeting someone organically in person but online dating can work for some people so don’t want to limit your options by not using it at all.”
As to the girl who ghosted, unfortunately for Piper, it’s a very common phenomenon. The site Nautilus reports that ghosting affects somewhere between 50% to 80% of people. Because it’s not just romantic relationships that are affected. “It crops up in all sorts of relationships, including acquaintances and online dating connections, but also long-term partners, colleagues, family members, and close friends.”
The reasons for ghosting are complex, ranging from concerns of safety, to time, to the perceived value of a given relationship. But also, there’s an idea that the person who does the ghosting doesn’t have a “script” or a guide to letting someone go. So it’s easier and less uncomfortable to just slip away. The problem is that the person who gets ghosted is left with unresolved feelings and questions.
While studies show that the hurt dissipates over time, there can still be a lingering uncertainty that carries emotional weight. While the “ghost” might justify what they’re doing as “a favor,” that instead of a big, disruptive confrontation, it’s just “easier” to slip away. Research does not support this. But humans are not entirely research-based creatures. So though Piper didn’t get the girl, he did get a great visit, and some press out out of it. Not bad for “The Go Do Stuff Guy.”
@jakep1911 The Story Of Why I’m In Tampa #dating #datingstorytime #single #storytime #singlelife ♬ original sound – jakepiper
